To every guy who has ever held my heart, carelessly crushed it, and made me to believe I am anything less than I am, I say this… you will regret it.
I know that I am not graceful. I am not one who will stand poised and demure with a flawless elegance. Nor will I shyly smile or politely bat my eyes. I am not reserved or speak only when spoken to. I wont skirt around subjects or act as though I’ve no wit about me. I will not dote. I will not fawn. I will not swoon. I’m not one to lie in order to save face and at times my honesty can appear downright brutal. I’m not dainty or petite. My mannerisms are not refined, nor have I ever once been considered prim or proper. The only thing polished about me are my toe nails, this week I painted them purple.
There are many things I am not, but I will tell you what I am. I am loyal to those I care about, and have known to sacrifice my own happiness if only for the joy of a friend. I am loud and opinionated. There is rarely a subject matter I haven’t made my stance clear on. I am passionate and animated. In my eyes even the most insignificant matters of this world deserve a flamboyant hand gesture or two. I am low maintenance and prefer sweat pants to my skinny jeans any day. I wear my heart on my sleeve, its easy to know if I’m happy or not. I can be cynical, although I try to remain positive. I am honest and will tell it like it is because I believe that any harm caused from the truth is far less a harm suffered then that caused by a lie. I am smart and I will never play dumb because I pride myself far too much on any ounce of knowledge I have acquired. I am witty and love to jar with best of them, if I can make you laugh, I will love you forever. I am competitive, I am aggressive, I am boisterous, and like all things in my life, I go all in or not at all.
… but I am also insecure and I just want to know, that beyond all the things that I am not, and considering all the things that I am… I just want to know that its okay. That I am still good enough anyway.
I am worth something. I am something special. I am someone worth spending time with. I will always be more then good enough…
So to every guy who has ever given me cause to believe I am anything less than I am, know this… if you don’t like it, you can shove it.
About Me
- Noelle Lani
- Life should be lived as play according to the phiolsopher Plato and me? I happen to agree. I am a very social person, I almost don't know how to communicate without flirting with people. I enjoy kicking back and spending a night in, but I'm also known for heading out for a night on the town, or just a midnight jaunt to the jungle gym. I believe that life is too short to be angry all the time, but you might often hear me complaining about some life stress. I think I just like to get things off my chest so I can move forward. Sometimes I write really dreary things because its easier and safer to be sad at the helm of my laptop, truly I am a happy person. I aim to be the life of the party, if I can get the crowd laughing and having a good time, then my work is done. It is my hope that my writing means something. I write because it makes me feel better, but at the end of the day if sharing one of my experiences can help someone else not feel so alone or help them learn from my mistakes, then I've created something worth while.
i love you
ReplyDeleteNoelle.. you are amazing! Guys suck! :)
ReplyDelete